today was probably the first time in a very long time that i can remember him saying, 'i'll cancel my appointment and come pick you up'. as spastic as it seems, it totally made my day. and while i was waiting, there was this voice in my head telling me not to get my hope too high up, he could easily cancel on you too. but he didn't (: and at e same time, there's some self-loathing that such a simple thing could make or break my day.

i really think i'm such a contradiction. i'm the most afraid of change, most unable to let go. yet i'm the one making the biggest changes in my life. totally uprooting my life and heading over to london to start brand new. the irony of it all. and watching asian boys on tues with screw (both of which was lovely, though somethings will never be the same again), looking at the 5 of us. 6 years with ming & rachel, 4 with cass & stef. it really made me look at each of them properly for the first time in quite awhile, and i realised we've grown up so much, changed so much. we're quite the mismatched group sometimes. haha, but despite all the negative emotions sometimes, the fights & squabbles, nothing makes me so content & happy as spending time with screw.

i love screw (: forever & always.

went out with jerrine on thurs (: for lunch & shopping. deb pang-seh the two of us. hahaha, but it was really nice, and it still strikes me how interesting & amazing it is we can not talk for a long time and meet and chatter non-stop. grins. i'll really miss her when she goes to us :p and the first time we met too, hilarious. dumped together by deb. grins. and we're going to buy our harry potter books tmr at 7.01 am :D heheee. i can't wait. met tiankai when i was out with her. hahaha, he got such a shock. i totally forgot he was in law, then now he's going to work in a london law firm (y) so i'll def be going to find him for advice in london. mehehehe.

driving test next week (: i'm so enjoying driving. the control it gives me. i likeeee.

: have you seen the rain :: rod stewart :